Friday, November 30, 2007

When I got home from work on Turkey Day, there was a new friend waiting for me.

Isn't she precious?! Her name is Nala. We think she was someone else's kitty, but she was outside shivering and hungry and Greg said he just couldn't leave her out there on her own. We're keeping an eye out for signs or things in the paper to see if someone lost her, but so far there's been nothing.

There she is with Bitsy. We think they are pretty close in age, but that's just based on how close they are in size.

I just love that picture of Bitsy. She likes to try to eat the camera. I swear, I've never seen a cat eat the things she does. A small list includes olives, peas and pickles. o_O

And then there were 5. For all the bitching he did about there being 4 cats, I never would have guessed that he'd bring home another one.

Monday, November 26, 2007

Someimtes I wish I actually had a cock so I could whip it out when I tell the world to suck it

Fucking seriously. Ok, so maybe I don't want to tell the entire world to suck my dick, but that's what fit in the subject line.

So, I don't think I blogged about my most recent appt with my "specialist" that happened the day before Thanksgiving. Allow me to do so now. There might be a lot of paragraphs that shouldn't actually BE paragraphs, but you'll deal with it if they appear. I just feel like separating things at random. Let's see if I do it.


I actually arrived at the office on time. This is pretty much unheard of since I am freakish;y late every where I go. I blame Japanese class in high school. But that's a different story for a different time.

I signed in and started reading my book The Jericho Pact. I got called back after about 15 minutes, which is awesome for his office. See, he's located inside Genesys and he's called out quite a bit for emergency c-sections and what not, so he's usually pretty backed up. I hobbled back to the room and started reading again after I told the nurse about all the pain I've been in. He came in and asked how I was doing and I spouted off to him about how I've been having trouble walking for over a month now and how my pain level is constantly at a 10. He then told me that he wants me to see another doctor. He no longer thinks a hysterectomy will help me. Seems he thinks I have Fibromyalgia. In other words, since the Depo Lupron didn't completely get rid of my pain like he wanted it to, he's giving me the big FUCK YOU and shoving me off on someone else. At that point, I was close to crying cuzz, fuck, I've been dealing with this for 5 years now and NO ONE has been able to tell me exactly what's going, why it's happening or how to fucking stop it. I think when he saw I was gonna cry that he started to feel bad cuzz then he told me that he wanted me to stop the Depo Lupron completely (I had just had my last injection a week and a half before this appt) and he'll do Laprascopy just to be sure that a hysterectomy won't help me. I reminded him, yet again, that when my grandmother had her hysterectomy BEFORE she was 30, they found endometrial cells on her spine, which is what my primary doctor thinks is happening to me. Of course, no one can be sure until they get in there, though. I also told him that he should review my mother's chart, since he's the one that did her hysterectomy last year and that it was possible I could be suffering for whatever the hell was wrong with her.

Then I asked him about pain meds.

See, I ran out of my precrition for Dilaudid the 16th, which is right when I should have. I called my primary doctor the following Monday and was told that she doesn't phone in prescriptions for narcotics over the phone. Ok, no big deal. I asked when I'd be able to get in to see her. I couldn't get in until today. They were closed Wednesday through Friday for Turkey day. I asked if I could speak with her to see about a possible exception since she'd have my chart there to review. I was told that was not her policy and I couldn't speak to her about it. I was pissed and made it known and then booked the appointment for today.

So, I asked him about possibly getting a prescription from him to get me through until I could see my primary. He asked if I was still taking Darvocet. I told him no, that I had been prescribed Dilaudid. He interrupted me at that point and told me that he will NOT prescribe Dilaudid for me or anyone else and that he would NOT be writing me any more prescriptions for pain relief. He then handed me my chart, told me AGAIN that he wouldn't prescribe me anything, pointed to the box of tissues since that's when I started crying and told me he'd see me in 6 weeks for the Laprascopy.

Fast forward to last night. I was at work and was in so much pain that I was shaking. I finally got through to my primary's phone service (I couldn't get through in the days prior for some reason) and explained to her what was going on and what had happened earlier in the week and she told me to go ahead and go to the ER. There just so happens to be one where I work, so Stephanie (a medic I work with and one crazy ass bitch) rolled me down in the office chair I sit in. The nurse who checked me in just so happened to know who my father is. She looked at my name and asked if I knew him, which kind of shocked me a little. Seems that she's worked at that hospital since 1979 and remembers him from when he used to come in for pain meds for his headaches. That kinda put me on edge a bit cuzz he's a drug seeker.

It took forever for the doctor to come to the room I was in. When he saw I was still dressed, he told me that I needed to change so he could examine me. That made me a little pissy cuzz I was hoping to not have to go through the whole pelvic bullshit, but whatever. So many fucking doctors have seen my hoo-hoo that it really doesn't bother me that much anymore. He left while I changed and took another forever to come back. Turns out, he just wanted to push on my belly and apparently I needed to be in one of those fuckin see through hospital gowns for him to do that.

He asked me why I was there and I explained to him all that's wrong with me and blahblahblah. He asked me what I was on for pain, so, of course, I told him that I ran out over a week prior and that I was on Dilaudid. He started shaking his head, telling me that he doesn't give that drug and he doesn't even write prescriptions. He then asked why they haven't "taken the uterus". I told him that he'd have to ask my doctors cuzz I've been telling them to for the last 5 fucking years. Then he told me that he wanted the nurse to draw my blood.

So, she did that while I layed there fucking fuming. See, that doctor was full of shit when he told me that he doesn't give Dilaudid and doesn't write prescriptions. He's given that to someone I know for the migrains they get, so I fucking know he gives Dilaudid. And on top of that, he gave a prescription for Vicoden to someone else I know just that afternoon! By the time she came in to draw my blood, I was crying, so she told me it would be ok and blahblahblah and then left.

After about 45 minutes, the doctor came back in to tell me that my blood TESTED CLEAN and that he wouldn't write me a prescription, which I told him I wasn't asking him to do, but he would have the nurse come back to give me an injection of Dilaudid. I got that about 10 to 15 minutes later and was told to keep my appt with my primary for today.

She didn't have anything new to add, just doubled my prescription so it'll last me a month this time and sent me on my way.

So, to sum it all up in case you've just skipped ahead of all my bitching, I've now been told that a hysterectomy WON'T help me and that I probably have Fribromyalgia. Even though my pain is NOT all over, NOT in my muscles and NOT triggered by pressure points. Basically, I've been given the big FUCK YOU, no-one-knows-what's-wrong-with-you-and-I'm-tired-of-dealing-with-you bullshit that I've been getting for the last 5 years. And it seems that everyone thinks I'm a drug seeker cuzz I'm on Dilaudid cuzz I am in ACTUAL pain.

The medical community can SUCK MY FUCKING DICK.

Friday, November 23, 2007

So, I am either awesome and just avoided being scammed or I just missed out on $2000 that I could REALLY use right now.

I just got a phone call from 201. Yeah, 201 is all that came up. On the other end was someone who was obviously from India or a country near there. He asked for me by name and I told him that I wasn't available and asked if I could take a message. He asked if I was family and I told him that I was my sister. I was told that since I have paid my social security taxes on time for many years, I was one of 10,000 people in Michigan that had been selected by the US federal government to receive two deposits of $1000 for the next two months into my checking account. I was told to look at it as a "Christmas bonus". Ok, I love free money and $2000 would get me out of this hole that Greg and I have dug ourselves into cuzz we are retarded with money. They knew my name and my address. All they needed from me was the name of my bank and my deposit number. That changed to my checking account number as the guy rattled on. When I could finally speak, I told him that I would not be giving him my checking account number. He kept asking me why I could not understand and that my checking account number was merely my identification number and was not confidential to the bank. I told him that I had no way to verify that he was legit and asked for his name and phone number so that I could call him back and verify. He said, again, that my checking account number was not confidential and that it was only an identification number. To make it sound like he was telling me the truth, he told me that he was not asking for personal information or my routing number or debit card numbers. I told him that anyone could walk into my bank with an ID that had my name on it and take money out of my account with only my checking account number. He responded by telling me that he would bet me it couldn't be done that way. I told him that I knew for a fact that it could cuzz I had just done so on Wednesday! He transferred me to his "manager", who sounded exactly like him, and HE proceeded to argue with me about it. Finally, I was transferred to an automated thing to obtain my confirmation number and was asked for my checking account number again.

I hung up. I could seriously use $2000 right now, but I can pretty well guarantee that my checking account would be drained and that I'd never see that fucking money. And seriously? $19 is not worth the hassle of having to cancel checks and close one account and open another.

I wanted to report it, but I can't figure out who to call or where to go online. Everything I come up with is about people getting fraudulent social security benefits and I don't think this qualifies.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Musical Masochist

(I know I've spelled quite a few words wrong in this, but for some reason, the spell check option isn't working for me. Weird...)

I'm not sure if I've ever gone off on a tangent about how much music means to me before or not. I've decided to do that now, even if I've done it before. See, I should be sleeping so I can go to the specialist all refreshed and what not, but that's not happening. And I've been drinking, too. Maybe I'm a little keyed up about my appointment tomorrow?

Anyway, I've always been obsessed with music. Ever since I can remember, I've been a music addict, often foregoing normal kid activities just so I could listen to a song on the radio or watch the video on Mtv. I remember when I was in 2nd grade, I was getting ready to leave for school and saw Janie's Got A Gun by Aerosmith coming on the TV. I decided to stay and watch it cuzz I had it in my head that all music videos and/or songs were only 2 minutes long. No clue where I got that from, but suffice it to say, I was pretty late for school that morning. I can remember getting ready for school in 6th grade and making sure my little brother got his ass going, all while listening to Brian Adams. Most of the significant things that have ever happened in my life I can tie to music in some way. It took me forever to be able to listen to Tori Amos again after I was raped cuzz I had that CD playing while I was sleeping and he came into my bedroom...

Moving on...

I've decided to throw up some of my favorite videos on here so I can share my favorite songs. I have a shit ton, so I'll be narrowing it down quite a bit, I hope you enjoy them.

Fine Again by Seether.

This was the first song I ever heard by Seether. This CD got me through most of my marriage. Especially this song. I wasn't sober for a lot of my marriage. There was a lot of bullshit going on, but this song helped imensely.

Broken by Seether

It's very possible you've heard the version of this song with Amy Lee helping out on vocals. While I love her voice, I much prefer this version of the song. When I was initailly going through my divorce, I would sing this to my son. When I first told his father that I wanted a divorce when he was 4 months old, he took off with my car and my son. I didn't know where they were for three days. It was the beginning of December and the Christmas tree was up with is little swing in front of it so he could watch the lights. I remember walking by his bedroom and bursting into tears cuzz he wasn't there and doing the same when I would walk past his swing. When I first left Matt for the last time, I was petrified he was gonna take off again. Thankfully he didn't, but every night I had Alex, I would sing this to him. He still remembers all the words and asks me to play the song all the time.

And So It Goes by Billy Joel

When I was a kid, I would go through my grandma's tapes and CDs. I "borrowed" this from her when I was about 9, I think. It made me cry. It made me think of my Great Grandma Arlene, which was great grandpa Lawrence's wife. I miss her more than I can put into words and for a long time, I was angry with her cuzz I thought she just abandoned me. I had a very difficult childhood and, until she died, she was my savior.

Hackensack by Fountains of Wayne

This song makes me think of the man that I was supposed to marry before I started seeing my ex-husband. He was my high school sweetheart, if you will. I met him while preforming in Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. He called me the "cute little redheaded girl", like from Charlie Brown. My goal was to get him to give me his kick ass Superman hat. We were together for over a year and his family gave me pictures of my PeePaw. I never got the hat.

Me and a Gun by Tori Amos

This is the song she wrote after she was raped. While it tells the story of what happened to her, I've always felt like it was telling the story of what happened to me in a way.

Hey Jupiter (remix) by Tori Amos

This song has just always felt like it was written for me.

Three Libras by A Perfect Circle

4 words. Maynard is a genius. The sadness and the raw emtion the words of this song portray draws me in every time. And you don't see me...

Blue by A Perfect Circle

Another awesome song lyrically. (Well, ALL the songs I post are awesome lyrically.) I just didn't want to know... I close my eyes, Ignore the smoke... Just beatiful.

Henry Lee by Nick Cave and the Badseeds featuring PJ Harvey

I love both of their voices. Actually, PJ Harvey's voice is very similar to my own. Such a haunting, beautiful song.

Wise Up by Aimee Mann

I first heard this on an episode of Crossing Jordan and thought it was The Pretenders. o_O There's also a very moving scene in the movie Magnolia that has all the main characters singing along with this song. This song could be so many points in my life...

Lie To Me by Devics

I'm a little jealous that I didn't write this song myself cuzz I feel like I could have. It follows my writing style pretty well. It makes me think of the man I was with in high school. The one I was supposed to marry. We still talk on occassion. This song could have been something that I said to him...

Coffee and Cigarettes by Michelle Featherstone

I found her on MySpace a while back and fell in love with this song. Again, another song that I'm a little jealous I didn't write.

My December by Linkin Park

I've posted the lyrics for this song before. I always feel incredibly lonely at night, which is usually when I'll listen to this song. It breaks my heart. Just wish that it didn't feel like there was something I missed... I always feel like there was something I missed somewhere along the way.

Pin Up by Evans Blue

I've been listening to this song repeatedly for the last few months. It was listening to this song that I began to wonder if the Depo Lupron might be having more of an effect on my emotions than I intially thought. I was driving home from darts one night while listening to this song. There's a paret of my drive that goes by a few lakes. All I wanted to do was to just drive into the water and sink. It felt like the most absolutely right thing in the world. And I wasn't particularly sad about anything. I was stressed, but no more than any other day. I just wanted to drive into the water and never think twice. If I didn't have my son, I more than likely would've done it.

So... I think that's where I'm gonna stop. That's a shit ton of songs to listen to and I commend anyone who's been able to get through all of them. I could go on forever, but the boy has moved out into the living room to sleep (he's got a wicked headache for some reason) and I need to get some rest so I can make it to my doctor's appointment in the morning. Hope you enjoyed my musical entry. And yes, I am well aware that my metal cred is probably no more. LOL

Sunday, November 18, 2007

It's over. The viewing was on Friday and the funeral was yesterday. I took the boy to the viewing and he did very well. I hadn't intended on staying for the rosary, but I went out for a cigarette and when I came back in, it had already started. I snuck in and just kind of listened. Afterwards, the boy asked my uncle why the priest kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was kinda cute. He kept pulling me over to the casket. I can't say that I was overly excited about that. I don't typically go up to the casket, especially if I'm trying to make sure I don't cry. On the way over, the boy told me that he had prayed he wouldn't cry while we were there. I told him that it was ok if he did, but he insisted that he didn't want to, so I was a bit concerned when he kept pulling me up to the casket. I thought that if I started crying, he probably would as well. But, I held it together. We left not too long after the rosary. We got to the funeral home shortly after 6 and by the time we left, it was 830 or so. The boy was a little mad at me for not wanting him to attend the funeral, even though he said he wanted to. Since it was a full Catholic funeral, though, I didn't think it'd be a good idea. It started at 11 and I don't think we left the church until around 1. I really don't think that he would've been able to be still for that long, no matter how hard he tried to.

I did ok at the funeral. I started crying during the opening hymn and I stared at the wall a lot. I just have a hard time watching everything I guess. At one point, the sister asked if anyone had anything they'd like to say about grandpa. No one stood up, which is just the way the family is, and I think my aunt got a little upset about it. She got up and went to the front and started talking about how special grandpa was to her and how it meant so much that he accepted my uncle (her husband). While she was talking, she started to cry and she looked over at me and I just lost it. Thankfully it was near the end. They did the closing prayer and hymn and then the family followed the casket outside. My aunt made a point to thank my parents for taking care of grandpa for as long as they had, which not a lot of people in the family has ever made it a point to thank them at all. I didn't stop crying until I got into my car. When we got to the cemetary, a horse started whinnying or whatever it's called when they talk. It was kinda like he was saying goodbye to grandpa. LOL There was a small prayer service at the graveside and my grandma started crying. It's rare to see that and it almost made me lose it again.

Oh, I forgot that I ended up having an asthma attack in the middle of the service. Heh. Everytime the incence got stronger, I had a harder time breathing. My mom kinda laughed at me cuzz I smoke and I used to get high and burn incence and have no problems. Apparently, when you don't smoke pot anymore and don't burn incence for a couple years (I used to burn it all the time just cuzz I like the smell) you begin to not be able to breathe around it? LOL

There was a HUGE floral arrangement that my grandpa wanted to give to the boy. (I'll post pictures of it later) He donated the rest of the flowers to the church, but this one was in a Detroit Tigers bucket (grandpa loved the Tigers), so he thought that the boy should have it. He also invited me and the child out to the house, which I guess is a big deal. No one else in the family has been invited out to the house, so I guess I have to make a really big effort to go over there. I'm not too sure if I want to or not, though. I remember the house being a certain way and I know that they've changed it quite a bit. They carpetted the hardwood floors and have redone some rooms and stuff. That house had hardly changed since my grandma passed and I loved that. It made it feel like she was still around a bit, ya know? I'm not sure if I'll handle seeing it all redone very well. We'll see, right?

Now that the funeral is over, the fun begins. There's a lot of drama regarding the will, the fact that my grandfather is pretty damned selfish and happens to be executor of the will and the fact that he has pretty much shunned the rest of the family recently. The most significant has been the fact that he has completely cut ties with my parents after grandpa had to be put into a nursing home. Basically, from what I understand, he doesn't want to give my parents a damned thing and has tried to convince people that they did a shitty job taking care of grandpa. Thing is, everyone in the family KNOWS how well my parents took care of him. It was to a point that my dad was the ONLY person he would allow to help him to the bathroom, get him cleaned up and do various other tasks that CENAs do in nursing homes. They did as best they could for as long as they could and my grandfather seems to be pissed off that he wasn't the one doing it, even though he had ample opertunity to do it and LIVED with grandpa for a while, but refused to do it. Anyway, there's gonna be a lot of drama regarding everything and I'm not looking forward to it at all. There's issues about the house being sold and the proceeds being divided up and the car is supposed to be sold and the proceeds being divided as well. There's already drama about that damned car. Everyone wants it and there is at least one relative who's been claiming that grandpa promised to give it to her. Whether he did or not is anyone's guess, since he didn't tell anyone about it. Ugh. I'm hoping that I get to have the knick knacks that were all around the kitchen. I've said since I was a little girl that I wanted to have those and I'd be happy if I even just got to keep one of them. We'll see. I'm not expecting anything and I'm not concerned about getting money or anything else. Just a knick knack or two.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

I knew it was coming...

Lawrence Dolehanty
DOLEHANTY, Lawrence James- Age 92, of Gaines, died Wednesday, November 14, 2007 at Durand Convalescent Home. Funeral Mass will be celebrated 11:00 AM Saturday, November 17, 2007 at St. Joseph Catholic Church, Gaines. Fr. Robert McKeon celebrant. Burial following at St. Joseph Catholic Cemetery. Visitation will be held at Sharp Funeral Home, Miller Road Chapel, 8138 Miller Road, Swartz Creek from 1-4 and 6-9 PM Friday, where a vigil service will be held at 7:00 PM followed by a Knights Of Columbus memorial service, and at the church from 10 AM until time of service Saturday. Those desiring may make contributions to the American Cancer Society. Mr. Dolehanty was born March 4, 1915 in Gaines, the son of Daniel J. and Alma (Brown) Dolehanty. He married Arlene Gilbert in 1938 in Gaines and she preceded him in death June 22, 1987. He retired from GM Fisher Body in 1968 after 36 years of service. He graduated from Gaines High School and has resided in Gaines his entire life. He was a member of St. Joseph Catholic Church and the Knights Of Columbus Council 12186. Surviving are: son, Daniel James and wife Doreen Dolehanty of Gaines; 8 grandchildren, 10 great-grandchildren and 1 great-great-grandchild; 6 step-grandchildren, 11 step-great-grandchildren; 2 sisters, Helen Aurand of Gaines and Ruth Bennett of Bay City; 3 brothers, Clem of Gaines, Paul of Texas and Harold of Rose City. He was also preceded in death by his parents; son, Edward Lee Dolehanty; sister, Thelma Brady; 3 brothers, Steve, Max and Leo Dolehanty. "Online condolences and tributes may be posted on the obituaries page of"

I'm happy that he's home now. I'm happy that he's finally with my grandma Arlene. But none of that makes it any easier. And it doesn't help ease the guilt I have about not seeing him as often as I should have these past few years.

He's happy now. He's not sick anymore. His memory is back to where it should be.

I feel like I'm being selfish by being so upset. For not crying around other people. I feel incredibly selfish for wondering how this is going to affect my job. I know I shouldn't feel like I'm being selfish, but I do.

The fact that things feel like they're being rushed doesn't help either...

I miss you grandpa. Tell grandma I miss her, too.

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Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Ok, so I know I'm getting behind my goal of making an entry every few days a week or whatever. (Although, technically, I did say that I was sticking to one entry a week so my slacker ass didn't get down on myself.) But you see, about 3 weeks ago, my uterus and ovaries decided to rebel against me and try to break free of this mortal coil. (Wow, I sound so dark and goth.) They have been losing, but they have been putting up a helluva fight. Such a helluva a fight, in fact, that today is the first day that I've been able to walk upright ALL.DAY.LONG.

I know, it's shocking, right?

Now, I'm not sure if that means that they are tiring of fighting or if the fact that I have the PLAGUE and have been laying on the couch ever since I came back from shooting my very first gun has anything to do with it. I'm hoping that they are giving up the fight, cuzz, really? I'm fucking tired of walking like an old lady. And I'm tired of being in pain, as well. In fact, I was supposed to call my doctor and see if she would call me in a refill of Dilaudid or if she needed to see me first. I'm betting she'll need to see me first, which is gonna kinda suck a lot of monkey balls.

In other news, I shot my very first gun today. Curious why? Well, I have decided that I am gonna "kill me a bambi" this year. (Not really killing a Bambi, I've just been telling people that to see what kind of reaction I get. Typically, it's a mix of horror and you-need-to-lay-off-the-crack-pipe-you-are-a-GIRL-don't-you-know-that?! Which amuses the hell out of me) I'm hoping that I get my child support tomorrow (it came last week) so I can go pick up an orange hat and at least an orange vest. You know, so I don't get mistaken for a Bambi. Apparently I shot damned well for my first time. My mom called to let me know that my step-dad had been raving about it when he got home. LOL

And that's pretty much gonna be it. I hear the couch calling my name and I need to go check on the boy and the nephew, as we are not at Scouts for the second week in a row. I've got the PLAGUE and I had to pick him up from school early cuzz he had an "accident". (read: shit his pants) I was LIVID when I got home. See, they called me to let me know that I needed to come get him cuzz of his "accident". Not a big deal. I said that I was on my way home and that I wouild swing by there before I actually got home. Then she tells me that he might need cleaned up. Excuse me? Now, normally, this wouldn't have been an issue. I live close enough to the school that I can get there in 5 minutes if needed. Except I wasn't at home today, and I was probably being a moron for thinking that when I SAID I wasn't home, that I was clear about NOT BEING HOME. I told her that I would stop home and grab him a change of clothes before I got up there and she said that he might need to be cleaned up. AGAIN. As if I didn't hear her the first time. I said fine and hung up. I had made up my mind that if he was in the bathroom covered in shit when I got there, I was pulling him from teh school. I mean, I can understand not wanting to do that kind of clean up cuzz of all the molestation allegations that go around and what not, but there comes a point where you say Fuck It and do it anyway cuzz if you don't you could potentially endanger the child. Seriously, being covered in shit is NOT something I want my child to do for longer than a few minutes if it can be helped. Luckily, he was in the office when I got there. He smelled like shit, as I assumed he would, and he had fingerprints on his shirt. I signed him out and asked him who helped him clean up when we got in the car. He said no one, that he had to do it himself as best he could. I wasn't happy about that, but, then again, he wasn't sitting in the bathroom waiting for me, so I guess it's not too big of an issue. I'll be letting my ex-mother-in-law know, since she pays his tuition, and I'll also be telling her that if they fuck up one more time, he's being pulled from that school.

Did I ever blog about the HUGE fuck up they made with Child Protective Services? Let me know and if I haven't, I'll blog about it as much as I can with out getting into too many details. The situation at his father's is NOT one that I want him to be in, but I jhave been told that I have no choice...

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Weirdest. Dream. EvAr.

Holy shit, I fucking LOVE that save feature that I wasn't so fond of before. I was listening to music on the intarwebs and it somehow decided that I was not going to play intarwebs anymore and it closed all the windows I had open, including the one that I was typing my update in. Thanks to that save thingie, my post was tucked safely away as a draft and I didn't lose anything. Huzzah!

Now we continue with the regularly scheduled update.

So, I had this dream. It was an odd kind of dream.

First, Greg had joined the National Guard. I went with him to see him off and wound up joining myself. Apparently, in my dream, the National Guard took place on an aircraft carrier. All of the training and being stationed and all that happy horse shit was on the same aircraft carrier. o_O

Then, I was on leave or something and I kept telling people that I had joined the National Guard and I would laugh like a crazy person. There was a Taco Bell and I guess it had some kind of pool surrounding it cuzz Greg was swimming around and I was floating on a raft thing in a bikini. Weird thing about that, well, besides the fact that I haven't even owned a swimsuit since I was about 15, was that my belly was magically gone but I had this GINORMOUS butt. I am talking one of those asses that you can see for miles and miles. So, I kept trying to cover my ass with my raft. The boy was there with his dad and we were trying to raise money for his school by eating food, but it wasn't Taco Bell food, it was hot dogs. Matt kept trying to make me feel like shit cuzz I had joined the National Guard and the kidling was going to miss me.

Then, I was suddenly carrying Harley into a movie theater. Cricket, you were there with your kitty and some guy. He was making an ass out of himself, like trying to draw attention to himself by acting like he was in high school and trying to do all these stupid tricks. So, we sat next to each other with our kitties, who were eating popcorn for some reason, and you kept telling him what an asshole he was. LOL Then I was walking into a house and you were sitting on the couch with your kitty, still telling the guy what a douche bag he was being. Harley and I sat on the couch and I saw this note that one of the guys I work with had written to the host of the party saying that me and this other guy I work with were gonna be showing up and it was gonna be "off the hook". Very odd. Anyway, I sat there with Harley for a while and just giggled at you telling this guy how much he sucked. I realized I had to use the bathroom and I walked around and found a bathroom outside off this huge ass deck. I went in, sat down and looked over to see two windows. One was at head level and the other was at bowl level and they looked right into the living room. I freaked out and woke up.

See? Weirdest.Dream.EvAr.

Monday, November 05, 2007

LOTS Of Pictures! Of CATS!

And the boy with his pumpkin. I forgot to take any pictures in his Ninja costume. Seems forgetting things has become my super power or something.



I'm not feeling creative enough to caption them. The older cats are starting to like the bitty one, I think. Baby lets her use her as a pillow and vice versa, so I know she's starting to warm up to her. Squeak will clean her on occasion and Mydna has pretty much adopted her as a sidekick. LOL

And that's all for tonight. Wow. 2 entries in a week. I'm impressed with myself.

Sunday, November 04, 2007

Everyone seems to be doing this NaBloPoMo thing. I am not due to the fact that I am lazy and I fail at updating anything lately. So, what I've decided to do is attempt to update at least once a week. I'm really shooting for 3 times, but I'll keep that little goal to myself and stick with the minimum of once a week. That way, if I am actually able to update 3 times a week, it'll be a happy fun surprise instead of a disappointment for myself.

So, not much is really new at the moment. Still broke as hell, though now it's a little more so than normal. See, there's something going on with the child support. Last week, it was $20 short and then it just didn't show up at all this week. When I tried to call the ex-husband to let him know about, just in case it was some kind of problem with Friend of the Court and not him, I discovered that his phone had been disconnected. Now, this leads me to 2 conclusions. 1- He got a job down near Detroit and he and his insta-family are going to be moving down there like his grandmother told me or 2- He quit his job cuzz his girlfriend/fiance/whatever is working and, really, why the hell should they have 2 incomes coming in when he can just sit on his ass and make an ass groove in the couch cushions while watching her kids run wild. I'll find out for sure when I pick up the boy after work tonight. I'm leaning toward the quitting the job thing, though I really don't want to find out that's the case. He's actually held a job since we separated which, for him, is pretty fucking spectacular. The only time he hasn't paid his child support was when he was in jail, (he was AWOL from the ARMY and was arrested a few Christmases ago) so I'm really hoping that he hasn't just fucked himself over by deciding that he doesn't need to work since she is. If that's what he's chosen to do, fine. Hope he has a good time with that. When he misses 2 months worth of child support, I'll be more than happy to lead the police right to his house so they can throw his ass in jail for being a douchebag dad.

I've been missing a lot of work lately and spending more and more time at the doctor's office. I'm not sure if it's the PCOS and the Endo or if it's the Depo Lupron, but something is messing with me. I'm having trouble walking and am at a constant 10 on the pain scale. Thing is, it's not just the normal pelvic pain that I have that's shot up to a 10. I now have pain in my hips and back to accompany it. It's fucking miserable. I have prescriptions for Diclofenac and Hydromorphone. The Hydromorphone makes things interesting. There's still the underlying pain, but it's no where near the point that I'm at right now (can't take it at work cuzz they have this thing about not taking controlled substances when you work EMS) and I don't seem to care too much that there's any pain at all. The Diclofenac doesn't really do too much that I can tell. I have to watch out for bleeding into the gut though, so that gives me a nice sense of adventure. I'm hoping to be able to get in to my Gyno next week to see if he can figure out what's going on and maybe get him to just take the girl parts away. I doubt he'll do that, but I'd really like him to.

The boy got his school pictures back and he looks like a little fuzz ball. The Bitsy is growing. She's about the size of my foot now and a bit bigger than my cell phone, so I know she's growing. LOL She's eats like she's a damned garbage disposal! She's face planted into my soup, a plate of eggs... She's eats olives, pickles, buffalo chicken wings. Pretty much anything that drops to the ground is inhaled by that little tiny cat. She's still small enough to squeeze under the doors, which I think makes the other cats jealous.

The boy and I will be traveling to see Great Great Grandpa sometime this week, I hope, since he's probably not gonna be around much longer. It kinda sucks that we won't be able to get out to see him if I don't get my child support any time soon. He's about 1/2 an hour away and gas isn't cheap, as I'm sure you know. I've got just under a 1/2 a tank right now and I don't get another pay check until the 15th. Hooray for $3 in the checking account! At least it's not a negative balance. That would really suck some balls.

Oh! My Sirius Satellite radio module got stolen out of my car yesterday sometime while I was working. I'm normally really good about locking my car up, but we had a pot luck for the Michigan vs. Michigan State game and I must've forgotten to lock it. I went out to my car to go home last night and it was gone. Thankfully, they didn't find the Nintendo DS in the backseat. We just got that for my son on his birthday. With the module gone, I'm only out about $30 to $40 cuzz I got it on sale a few months back. Had they found the DS, I'd have been out another $130.

And that's pretty much it. Got some new kitty pictures to post, but I'll have to do that from home. Now I've got to try and come up with something for the scouts to do at their meeting on Tuesday. Hooray. o_O