Saturday, May 16, 2009

In Which I Blame My Mommy For Me Being An Asshole.

So, I was at work this morning and got out of the office about 10 minutes late. No big deal, happens all the time. I went outside thinking my mom would be there, but she wasn't, which, again, no big deal. Happens a lot. So, I decided to have a cigarette and call my step-dad in case he was home and could remind my mom if she had forgotten. Well, he was on his way to Chesaning, but he said that my mom was awake when he left and she knew she had to come get me. So, I got off the phone, thinking maybe she got stuck behind a back hoe again. (I think that happened last week.)

I stood outside, smoking my cigarette and watching traffic, but I didn't see her by the time I was finished, so I decided to go inside and jump on FaceBook really quick in case she was on there and lost track of time.

- Keep in mind that she was driving a car that I've only seen a handful of times -

I went up to the door and saw a car that looked like my mom's pull into the Chase bank next door. I watched it turn around and saw that it was pulling into the base, so I told everyone I was leaving and walked up to the car. I opened the passenger door and saw that there was a coat on the seat, so I went to kinda set my purse on the floor so I could move the coat.

And then I heard, "I'm sure you think I'm someone else..."

Thankfully, I didn't say what I was thinking, which was, "What the hell?"

Seems I had decided that I was going home and I would be driven by a little old lady. A little old lady who was not related to me in any way, shape or form.


Hi, I'm Leslee and I'm a ginormous asshole.

I am SO happy I didn't start cussing. I have enough presense of mind not to when there are patients around or if someone comes in to pay a bill or something, but this was the end of my shift and I was feeling pretty giddy. See, not only was she a little old lady who was a completely stranger to me, but she was ALSO a little old lady who was coming to the base to drop off church pamphlets.

I had no choice but to take them. I mean, I had just tried to get into this lady's car for crap's sake, I couldn't very well turn down the pamphlets and tell her no soliciting. I may be a ginormous asshole, but I try to be nice to old people. :-P

So yeah, cuzz my mommy was running late to pick me, I showed my asshole skills to a completely unsuspecting old lady. I am TEH AWESOMER than you!

(I have GOT to stop forgetting I have this! :-/)